When and How to Tell Your Boss You’re Expecting
Carla Greenan Greenan, Founder 
How to Navigate Parental Leave Conversations with Confidence and Courage
You and your partner are expecting—congratulations!
As you prepare for this exciting new chapter, there’s a big to-do list running in your mind. And somewhere near the top of that list is a question that many working parents wrestle with:
When do I tell my employer I’m pregnant?
And how do I discuss maternity leave in a way that supports both me and my team?
These conversations can feel overwhelming—especially when you’re navigating work expectations, company policies, and your own hopes and fears about parenthood. But here’s the truth: You can approach these transitions with confidence and courage. You can advocate for yourself in ways that prioritize your needs, your partner’s needs, your baby’s needs, and your career goals.
Let’s walk through the key steps to help you prepare for this conversation and set yourself up for success.
When to Tell Your Employer You’re Pregnant
There’s no one-size-fits-all answer for when to tell your employer you’re pregnant. If you want to be covered by FMLA, typically your employer needs at least 30-days notice before parental leave starts, however, many employees choose to give more time than that. Even though you are not obligated, it can be beneficial for both parties to have sufficient notice so you can collaborate with your team on smooth transitions. Some other things to consider:
Your Comfort Level — You don’t owe anyone an immediate announcement. If you’re feeling uncertain or want to wait until after the first trimester, that’s okay. Your timeline should feel right to you.
Your Workload and Role — If your role involves long-term projects or client deliverables, consider timing your announcement around key milestones. Giving your team enough notice allows for smoother planning and makes it easier to share coverage responsibilities.
The Physical Demands of Your Job — If your role involves travel, physical tasks, or unpredictable schedules, you may want to tell your employer sooner so you can adjust as needed.
Bottom line: The “right time” is when you feel ready—and when it makes sense based on your work responsibilities. Many working parents choose to announce their pregnancy between 12 and 20 weeks, but it’s a personal decision.
Prepare for the Conversation
Before you walk into your manager’s office (or open that Zoom call), it helps to spend some time preparing. This preparation doesn’t just benefit your employer—it also empowers you.
Here’s how to get ready:
Know Your Company’s Parental Leave Policy — Familiarize yourself with your company’s leave options, short-term disability plans, and any additional benefits they offer. Knowing the basics can .
Draft Your Ideal Leave Plan — Ask yourself: “How much time do I want to take off? Do I want to transition back gradually or return all at once? What’s the earliest and latest I could return, based on my family’s needs?” Your answers don’t have to be final, but having a general idea of your preferences can help guide the discussion.
Anticipate Questions — Your manager will likely ask how your leave will impact projects and how your team can support your transition. Be proactive by brainstorming ideas for coverage plans or temporary solutions. This shows you’re invested in creating a smooth process for everyone involved.
Have the Conversation with Confidence
Now that you’re prepared, it’s time to share the news.
- Start with Positivity — Lead with your excitement and the key message: You are expecting.
Example: “I’m excited to share that I’m expecting a baby. I wanted to let you know so we can start planning for a smooth transition together.”
- Outline Your Proposed Plan — Share your preliminary thoughts on your leave plan. Remember, you don’t have to have everything figured out in this conversation—it’s okay to outline your preferences and note that you’ll be refining the plan as things progress.
Example: “I’m planning to take [X] weeks of leave, starting around [estimated date]. I’d like to discuss how we can ensure everything runs smoothly while I’m out and how I can stay connected as needed during the transition.”
- Highlight Your Commitment — Reassure your employer of your dedication to your role and your desire for a seamless transition.
Example: “I’m committed to making this process as smooth as possible for the team. I’ve started thinking about potential coverage plans and would love to collaborate on the best approach.”
- Invite Collaboration — End by inviting feedback and collaboration to foster a supportive tone.
Example: “I’d love to hear your thoughts and any questions you might have as we start this process.”
Advocate Your Needs with Courage
One of the hardest parts of these conversations isn’t just discussing logistics—it’s advocating for your needs. Many working parents struggle with feeling like they’re asking for “too much.”
Here’s the reminder you need: You’re not a burden. You’re a professional and a parent, and your needs are valid.
Tips for Advocacy:
Name Your Needs Clearly — Be specific about what support you’ll need, whether it’s flexible hours leading up to your leave or a gradual return-to-work plan.
Reframe Self-Advocacy as a Strength — Speaking up for yourself isn’t selfish; it’s courageous. When you advocate for your well-being, you’re modeling healthy boundaries and setting an example for others. (And trust me, you’ll need to practice this boundary-setting-muscle-memory when baby is here and every well-intentioned family member wants to kiss her on the hands and mouth.)
Emphasize the Benefits for Everyone — When you have what you need to thrive, you can show up fully at work and at home.
Following Up and Staying Connected
After the initial conversation, keep communication open:
Send a Follow-Up Email: Summarize key points from your conversation and next steps to ensure alignment.
Plan Check-Ins: As your leave date approaches, schedule check-ins to review timelines and coverage plans.
Discuss Your Return-to-Work Plan: Before you return, outline any adjustments you’ll need and discuss how your team can support your transition.
A Courageous Transition
Telling your employer that you’re expecting and planning your maternity leave is more than just a conversation—it’s a declaration of your values, goals, and priorities. It’s a reminder that your career and your family life can coexist, and you have the right to create a plan that supports both.
Courage doesn’t always feel big. Sometimes, it looks like having a conversation you’ve been dreading. Sometimes, it’s speaking up when it feels easier to stay quiet. But every small step builds a foundation of trust, confidence, and empowerment.
As you prepare for this new chapter, remember: You’ve got this! And if you need guidance, resources, or someone to cheer you on, the You’ve Got This! Course is here to support you through every step of your transition.
Categories: : Working Parents