Paternity Leave: Why More Dads Should Take It and How to Make It Work
Carla Greenan, Founder 
Discover why more dads should take paternity leave—and how to make it work.
It's 3 AM. The baby's crying. Again. One parent stumbles out of bed while the other continues sleeping—who's getting up matters more than you might think.
When it comes to those critical first weeks of a newborn's life, having both parents fully present and engaged can transform the family dynamic for years to come. Yet only 5% of fathers take all the paternity leave available to them, despite mounting evidence of its profound benefits.
The Dad Dilemma
The scenario plays out in workplaces across the country every day: A soon-to-be father with access to generous paternity leave plans to take just a fraction of the time available to him. The reasons are predictable and pervasive.
"I can't be away that long." "My team needs me." "I'll fall behind on important projects." "No one else in my department has ever taken full leave."
Sound familiar?
Imagine instead bonding with your newborn during those critical first weeks, being fully present without the stress of work emails or meetings pulling at your attention. Yet, many dads hesitate to take paternity leave, often due to stigma, fear of career setbacks, or lack of clear policies.
The data tells a compelling story: When fathers do take full paternity leave, they consistently report transformed relationships with their children, strengthened partnerships, and surprisingly minimal career disruption. Most discover their teams manage just fine in their absence and that the benefits far outweigh the temporary workplace adjustments.
Why Paternity Leave Matters
When we discuss parental leave, the conversation often centers around mothers. But paternity leave is equally important for strengthening family foundations.
Dads who take paternity leave form stronger emotional connections with their babies from day one. Research consistently shows that early bonding contributes to long-term positive developmental outcomes for children. Those first weeks aren't just about diaper changes and sleep deprivation—they're about establishing patterns of connection that last a lifetime.
For new mothers, having a partner at home makes a tremendous difference in the postpartum experience. When fathers take leave, they can share the physical and emotional load, potentially reducing the risk of postpartum depression and creating a more balanced transition to parenthood. As one dad I coached told me, "Being home for those first weeks gave my wife the support she needed to recover, and gave me confidence I wouldn't have found otherwise."
Beyond individual families, paternity leave promotes gender equality in profound ways. When men take leave, they help normalize caregiving roles across genders and model equitable parenting for future generations. We're not just changing diapers—we're changing culture.
For your baby:
Creates stronger emotional bonds that last a lifetime
Establishes a secure attachment with both parents from the beginning
Contributes to positive developmental outcomes
For your partner:
Provides critical support during physical recovery from childbirth
Reduces risk of postpartum depression when responsibilities are shared
Creates a more balanced transition to parenthood for everyone
For society:
Normalizes male caregiving roles
Promotes gender equality in the workplace and at home
Models equitable parenting for future generations
The Benefits of Paternity Leave for Dads
Taking paternity leave isn't just good for babies and partners—it offers significant benefits to fathers themselves.
Picture this: It's 2 a.m., and you're rocking your newborn back to sleep. It's exhausting, yes—but in that quiet moment, you're also building neural pathways of connection that will serve both of you for decades to come.
Early caregiving promotes emotional intelligence and empathy. I've seen many dads develop a deeper understanding of their children and themselves through the daily routines of infant care. One client shared, "I thought I was taking leave to help my wife, but I ended up discovering a side of myself I never knew existed."
The early weeks of parenthood are mentally challenging for everyone involved. Taking leave allows dads to adjust to their new reality without trying to juggle work demands simultaneously. This separation helps reduce the stress and anxiety associated with balancing work and new parenthood, allowing fathers to be more present.
From an employment perspective, companies with flexible leave policies report higher employee satisfaction and lower turnover rates. Contrary to fears about career penalties, many organizations now recognize that supporting new parents strengthens loyalty and commitment.
Perhaps most importantly, dads who take leave develop greater parenting confidence. By directly engaging in infant care from the beginning, fathers build skills and comfort that serve them throughout their parenting journey. They're not "helping mom"—they're actively parenting.
Personal growth opportunities:
Develop deeper emotional intelligence and empathy
Build confidence in your parenting abilities from day one
Create a foundation for lifelong involvement in your child's life
Discover aspects of yourself you never knew existed
Professional benefits:
Return to work with fresh perspective and renewed focus
Experience improved job satisfaction when your employer supports your whole life
Demonstrate loyalty to companies that honor your family commitments
Enhance problem-solving skills developed through hands-on parenting
One client, Jordan, worried that taking leave would hurt his chances for promotion. Instead, he found that his leadership skills actually improved after paternity leave. "I became more efficient, more empathetic with my team, and better at prioritizing what really matters," he explained. "Those aren't just dad skills—they're leadership skills."
Why More Dads Don't Take Paternity Leave
Despite the clear benefits, many fathers still don't take paternity leave. The barriers are both cultural and practical.
Workplace stigma remains a significant obstacle. Many dads fear being seen as less committed to their careers if they prioritize family time. Without visible role models who have successfully navigated paternity leave, this concern persists. I often remind my clients that pioneering these changes might feel uncomfortable, but they're paving the way for others to follow.
Financial concerns also loom large. The reality of unpaid or partially paid leave makes this decision difficult for many families. Understanding the financial implications and planning accordingly is crucial.
Lastly, many fathers simply don't know their rights or their company's policies. Information gaps about eligibility, duration, and return-to-work arrangements leave many men uncertain about how to proceed.
Common obstacles:
Fear of being seen as less committed to career advancement
Lack of visible male role models who've taken extended leave
Financial concerns about unpaid or partially paid leave
Uncertainty about company policies and legal rights
Pressure to maintain traditional provider role
I remember coaching Carlos, who worked at a company where no man had ever taken more than a week of paternity leave. "I want to take the full time," he said, "but I'll be the first." We worked through his concerns about pioneering this change, and he ultimately decided to set a new precedent. His courage inspired two other fathers on his team to take full leaves within the next year.
How to Prepare for Paternity Leave
Start by understanding your rights. Review your company's parental leave policies and familiarize yourself with state and federal laws like the Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA). Check whether your employer offers any paid leave benefits specifically for fathers—more companies are expanding these offerings.
Communication with your manager is crucial. Initiate the conversation early—ideally months before the expected arrival—and express your intentions clearly. Frame your leave as a positive for team collaboration by emphasizing your commitment to a smooth transition. One effective approach I've seen is when dads say, "I want to make sure my responsibilities are covered seamlessly while I'm out bonding with my new baby. Can we discuss a transition plan?"
Create a comprehensive work coverage plan. Identify your key responsibilities and develop strategies for handling them during your absence. Offer to train colleagues who will cover for you and document important processes. This proactive approach demonstrates professionalism and eases concerns about your time away.
Before leaving, set boundaries for your return. Discuss whether a phased re-entry might be possible and establish expectations about communication during leave. Clear parameters help protect your family time and manage work expectations.
Step 1: Know your rights and options
Review your company's parental leave policies thoroughly
Understand FMLA and state-specific leave protections
Explore paid leave benefits offered by your employer
Calculate financial implications and plan accordingly
Step 2: Communicate strategically
Initiate the conversation with your manager 3-4 months before your baby's arrival
Frame the discussion positively: "I'm planning ahead to ensure a smooth transition"
Be clear and specific about your intended leave timeline
Address potential concerns proactively with solutions
Step 3: Create a comprehensive transition plan
Document key processes and information
Train colleagues who will cover your responsibilities
Set up appropriate handoff meetings
Consider staggering your leave if that works better for your situation
Making the Most of Your Paternity Leave
Once your leave begins, focus on being fully present. This might mean temporarily stepping away from work email and minimizing other distractions. The emails will wait—these precious early moments won't.
Share responsibilities with your partner intentionally. Have open conversations about how to divide tasks in ways that honor each person's strengths and needs. Remember that partnership looks different for every family.
Don't forget self-care. New parenthood is exhausting for everyone. Prioritize rest when possible, maintain supportive connections, and find small moments to recharge. Taking care of yourself enables you to be more present for your family.
Consider documenting your experience through photos, journals, or voice notes. These memories become precious over time and help reinforce the importance of your involvement during this critical period.
Daily practices for meaningful paternity leave:
Create simple routines that provide structure amid the newborn chaos
Take on specific caregiving responsibilities that are "yours"
Document the journey through photos, journals, or voice notes
Find moments for self-care to maintain your energy and patience
Connect with other dads going through similar experiences
Supporting Dads Who Want to Take Paternity Leave
Encourage open conversations about paternity leave in your workplace. Simply asking experienced fathers about their leave experiences can help shine light on available options and challenges. By talking openly about parental leave for all genders, we help dismantle outdated norms.
Advocate for clear, supportive leave policies within your organization. If you're in a leadership position, consider reviewing and expanding existing policies to better support new fathers.
Building a supportive culture is especially important. When male leaders visibly take paternity leave, they send a powerful message that family engagement is compatible with career success. As one executive I worked with said, "I took my full twelve weeks because I wanted every man on my team to know they could do the same without judgment."
If you're a leader:
Take your own paternity leave fully and visibly
Share your experience openly with your team
Advocate for expanded paternity benefits
Ensure returning fathers receive support during reintegration
If you're a colleague:
Express support when male coworkers announce leave plans
Offer to help with coverage during their absence
Ask thoughtful questions about their experience when they return
Challenge dismissive comments about paternity leave in workplace conversations
What to Do If Your Employer Isn't Supportive
Know your legal protections under FMLA and state-specific laws. These provide baseline guarantees that employers must honor regardless of internal culture.
Engage your HR department for support in navigating policies and addressing concerns. HR professionals can often help mediate conversations and clarify misunderstandings about leave policies.
In more challenging situations, consider connecting with workplace advocacy groups or seeking legal guidance. These resources can help you understand your options if you face discrimination or policy violations.
First steps:
Document all conversations about your leave requests
Reference your legal protections under FMLA and state laws
Connect with HR to clarify policies and express concerns
Seek out allies in leadership positions
If challenges persist:
Consider flexible alternatives (part-time, remote work, staggered schedule)
Connect with workplace advocacy groups for guidance
Consult with legal resources if discrimination occurs
Evaluate long-term fit with your organization's values
Normalizing Paternity Leave Is a Win for Everyone
Taking paternity leave benefits families, improves workplace culture, and supports gender equality. When fathers engage fully in early childcare, they help create more balanced family dynamics and more inclusive workplaces.
As we move forward, I encourage all expectant dads to explore their leave options, plan ahead, and advocate for policies that empower fathers to be fully present for their families. The journey of parenthood begins with these early choices—make ones that align with your family values and long-term vision.
The transition to parenthood is one of life's most profound journeys. As I often tell my clients: You've got this!
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